Song in my head

This song kept playing in my head.

In the image of God, we were made long ago,
with the purpose divine, here his glory to show;
But we failed Him one day, and like sheep went astray,
thinking not of the cost, we His likeness had lost.
But from eternity, God had in mind,
the work of Calvary, the lost to find;
From His heaven so broad, Christ came down earth to trod,
so that men might live again in the image of God.

Now that I have believed, and the Saviour received,
now that I from the guilt, of my sins am relieved,
I will live for my Lord, counting no gain nor loss,
but for love thinking of, what His likeness has caused
I'll never comprehend, redemption's plan,
how Christ could condescend, to die for me;
Such a Saviour I'll praise, till the end of my days,
as I upward, onward climb, in the image of God

God has been impressing this hymn upon my heart for quite a few days now.

Redenmption's plan is something I could not understand. Why God would send His Son? But this I hope to do, to live my life worthy of His name, in my words, conducts and thoughts.

Lord, it's my prayer that this desire continues to grow nd burn like the candle which never goes out.

Stereotype and humility

Some additional thoughts.


I had dinner with two lovely sisters yesterday night. We reminisced bout the past, we shared bout our experiences after having to work for some time now, we share bout our passion and gossips. But one thing that kept me extremely thankful is that none of us has changed. We still share the same dreams of seeing God to work wonders in our lives. We still continue to pray for God to work among us, we longed to see more people being raised and more workers to be raised. We long to see a revival in our church, in our homes, in our work places and in our country.

Along the way, a sister pointed out that unknowingly we were taught to stereotype. We paused and thought. She was right. I remember in my conversations with my colleagues on life partners. I said that he must not be a smoker. They all jumped at my statement and claimed that smoking is a habit and like other habits, can be changed and improved. The Bible teaches us to love the sinner but hate the sin but here I am judging even the person. And even when I join other assembly's camps, I tend to see them in a different light. I was judging them in the way they read or sing. Oh God, please forgive me for my sins. I'm at not position to judge and there's no reason for me to think that I'm in anyway higher than anyone else. God, You alone deserve the praise and glory.

It's really important to keep our feet on the ground and be humble at all times. Lord, be my guard.

My God is good

The past few weeks have been different and a fresh breath to my almost-becoming-mundane life. It has just been about work , a little of church, friends and family. The pace of life was so quick for the past months that I lost track of a lot of things. I was quickly ushered in into a new project even before my previous project ended. Life was speeding past me and I couldn’t catch up.

Timely, however, it’s the month of August, the month of camps. I believe this is timely because it wouldn’t be if not for God. I went for a bible conference where speakers like Peter Ferry and Shawn Abigail spoke. It drew many stares for the fact that I’m going for this conference instead of my annual family camp, held on a adjacent-yet-not-so-adjacent hill. Some gave me blunt-beyond-shocked faces punctuated with many whys. Having decided, I went ahead. It was a great conference. Peter Ferry spoke on Malachi and Shawn Abigail on Dispensationalism. If you think dispensationalism is a higher learning, you are deadly wrong. In fact, it is very fundamental and in my opinion, crucial to all believers. Dispensation talk about stewardship and how God dealt with people of and at different periods. There are dispensation of innocence, conscience, human government, promise, law, grace and kingdom. It is an orderly arrangement, administration and interaction between God and His people.

Dispensation of innocence begun in the Garden of Eden where God told Adam and Eve not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Innocent and all they need to do was to obey and Adam was given authority to rule over all the earth. But they failed to obey and just when they sinned, they realized they were naked. Then, dispensation of conscience begins. After being driven out of the garden, they had to feed themselves. And despite having conscience to distinguish between right and wrong, man still sin. Cain murdered Abel. People thought they could reach heavens if they unite, hence the tower of Babel and many other instances. Man still sin. Their conscience is marred. Then, they wanted ruler to be over them, hence the dispensation of human government. But despite having human leaders, man fails to obey too. God then promised Abraham that He would through him, bring forth many descendants. This is the dispensation of promise. But Abram didn’t believe and had Ishmael with his maid servant. Man fails yet again. God then brings forth the dispensation of law. Man had to obey 613 laws and needless to say, they fail. Then it was the dispensation of grace, This is the period that we are living in. God sent His Son to die on the cross for us and by His grace, we are saved. But man still do not believe God. The bible speaks of the return of Christ by which the dispensation of millennium will begin. The bible also speak of the failure of man to believe for many will be cast into the lake of fire. In each dispensation however, God still gets the glory.

The reason why I say this is fundamental is because it really is and it helps you understand why God treats people differently at different times. I find it really helpful and now I’m being able to see the bible in a different light. I always thought that the OT has nothing to do with me, all the more when the church is not Israel and Israel is not the church. But now I see why it’s this way. God deals with His people differently at different time. You would see how gracious our God is in each period and how sinful man is. God truly gets the glory in the end because He’s God. I always thought that God would definitely get the glory because, well, He’s the main player and He does what He wants but now I understand the sovereignty of God. He just deserves and He gets the glory ultimately because man is useless. We cannot outbeat or out wit God. Soli Deo Gloria! To God alone be the glory! Amen!

I didn’t intend it to be a message but I felt the need to explain because it would really be good if all of us understand this truth. To read more, go to Shawn Abigail’s website at brethrenonline.org. He has many writings there. Apart from the enlightening messages, conference was good because you get to meet people from different assemblies. It’s good to make friends. Though I went alone and many thought it was weird, I survived it and I met some really wonderful people who loves the Lord and are passionate for His work. I am looking forward to next year’s already. It would be excellent and beneficial for everyone, especially the youth in our assembly to attend. Healthy exposure.

Then, last weekend, I was at another camp. This time round, it was a youth camp for students up to young working adults. It was another refreshing camp. I didn’t have much of a cultural shock and it was acceptable. There, I see something which I longed to see within my assembly. I see out poured passion for God. There was so much energy and I believe God could use these passionate and energetic youth for His work. It wasn’t the hype or spur of the moment, though I would say intense repetition of verses and choruses are not necessary but it’s impactful. It has been my prayer lately that God will raise more and more people for His work. More workers to go out and bring people into the church. For His people to love Him more, so much that it overspills and non-Christians testify to that testimony and be saved. My heart aches seeing my unsaved family and friends at different juncture of my life. My heart aches when I see the condition of our country. As grateful as I am that I’m in a country that doesn’t discriminate against Christians, I longed to see more souls being saved. And I see such love and passion at the camp. I remember someone said that we are so heavy in knowledge that we lacked the doing. We failed to allow God to work or to use us for Him. Because we don’t trust in our hearts though we do by head, we deny God in displaying His mighty power.

And the recent Passion conference I went to, it brought a grim reminder that greater things are yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city. There’s so much work more to do, within or outside our assembly. I remember I gave up in my service with the youth because I didn’t see myself contributing to them. Now thinking back, maybe it wasn’t the area for me. How Lord can I be used? I want to see changes. I want to see your people being passionate for you. I want to see the spirit of sharing being manifested in church.

Would you use me, Lord?

My prayer is this, that this desire to serve and to make a change for our God will not die of with time. And my fellow friends, there are so much more to do for our God. Let’s strife harder.

Hosea and Gomer

Don’t know what He sees in me
He is spirit, he is free
And I, the wife of adultery
Gomer is my name
Simply more than I can see
How he keeps on forgiving me
How he keeps his sanity
Hosea, you’re a fool


CHORUS:

A fool to love someone like me
A fool to suffer silently
But sometimes through your eyes I seeI’d rather be a fool
The fondness of a father
The passion of a child
The tenderness of a loving friend
An understanding smile
All of this and so much moreYou’ve lavished on a faithless whore
I’ve never known love like this before
Hosea, you’re a fool


CHORUS


This God of yours would not have told
To lift a love that you couldn’t hold
And though time and time again
I fleeI’m always glad to see you coming after me
Simply more than I can see
How he keeps on forgiving me
The wife of adultery
And Gomer is my name

I was thinking

This is a serious attempt to revive this blog. Haha..It's been dead for some months now. Darsh told me she gave up reading my blog because I never update it. My only excuse is that I've had my hands full on other things, work, family, church...Soemtimes, after working for a good 10 hours, you wouldnt want to face the computer anymore when you reach home.
Anyway..Much has happened during these absence. I've had my prayers answered, there were breakthroughs in my family, some major accident nearly wreaked my family apart, insight to the reality of human evil-ness, power of tongues and weakness of the heart when it comes to emotions. I've also experienced the goodness of our Lord..Man..it's been wonderful.
To start off, work hasnt been very interesting. To a point, it's becoming draggy. I was once very sure that this is where God wants me to be and with Him leading me here, I'm prepared to stay to learn but I am not sure till when. I need to revive my spiritual life as well, I need to pick up on reading the bible every night.
My family was involved in a major accident last Saturday. They were coming down from Ipoh and soon, it began to rain and puddles of water were on the road. Needless to say, they skidded on the road, hit the divider and turned and spinned before landing on the emergency lane. Thankfully, God has really been gracious to this family. They all escaped unhurt. With no visible serious injuries. Went for check-ups and thank God that they did not sustain any internal injuries as well. It's really my prayer and I hope it would be yours aswell even as you read this that it would be an opening to a soul searching experience for each one of them as they pass from that valley of death. God has truly held each one of them closely and that none were lost. Havent had the opportunity to see the wreakage and could only imagined. But mum said it was really bad.
Side tracked, had a sleepover in my house that day with a few close friends. Been so long since we caught up. And it was so good to hear from them. One related matters of the heart and as exciting as it sounds to me, it also dawns upon me the reality of temptations and how weak our body can be. It's undeniably true that feelings can be very over powering. Especially when you've been showered with so much attention. This dear sister pointed out one bit," Non-believers accept me better than Christian brothers."
I paused and thought, that was very true. It's such a shame that we who belong to the family of God feel unbelonged within our family. With no fingers pointing anywhere, it's good for us to pause and think. I was brought up in a way where unequally yoked relationships will never work. I dont deny that there are some successful ones where one partner eventually embraced Christ and both grew very strongly. But there must be a reason why God put that verse in Corinthians to remind us not to be unequally yoked. Since I came out to work, my circle of friends are mostly non-believers. It's been a real blessing having these friends around. We clicked well, we enjoyed doing things together. We shared stories, experiences, gossips..With the guys in the group being attached (which helped greatly because it would mean totally out of the consideration), I couldnt help but thought that they guys are really more interesting people. Comparing with the guys I see in church. Perhaps it was different up bringing, family background. There's this sense of maturity that I dont find among the already scared population of eligible males in church.
Thankfully however, I have a group of wonderful and close cliques of girlfriends who stand by the same principles as me. God say." Do not be unequally yoked." Therefore, I shall no be unequally yoked. I trust that God would honour this obedience as He has honoured so many before. As for this sister, it is truly my prayer that you would seek His will above all and as you strive to obey Him, He would honour you in return.We just need to stand by faith and with each other in this case (which I have no doubt we would stand by each other)
Breakthroughs in my family. My parents finally went to listen to a chinese testimony and gospel in a church in KL. I had always wondered how would God speak to my dad and indeed, He has opened a door just yet, in His perfect timing! I pray and hope that God would continually working miracles within this family and that we would all come to the knowledge of His saving grace.